Ice Princess

This a "poem" I wrote my freshman year of high school.
I didn't write it for any classes. Just in a journal I kept that I recently scanned through. This is about the abandonment I had felt at the time from my father.

In the darkness
not of the night
but of my loneliness
without you in my life
I reach for nothing
and nothingness reaches back
I search for the warmth
you once gave me
coldness from you
freezes my heart
don't know what is worse:
the loneliness of the emptiness
or the thought
of never loving again...


You said we could write stuff like this right? Or is this too personal? I might be a little confused.

Sixth Assignment..

I never expected that at OCC no matter what the weather conditions... we would have to go to class. Walking in the rain stinks, especially if you have to go to work directly after class. I haven't fully gotten the chance to experience what OCC has to offer because I've been busy with school, and work. I plan on joining the colleges radio station. So for right now it meets my expectations. Once I get my associates degree I plan to transfer to an out of state school. College is what I though it was going to be; hectic, more laid back, and time consuming. I'm fine with it though. I'm starting to love school anyway.

Fifth Assignment!

I've had a favorite band since I was probably in the seventh grade. Incubus is by far the most moving band to me. Their incredible musicians, and gorgeous human beings. One of my all time favorite songs can relate to different changes in my life. It motivates me and reminds me that I need to stay on my feet in any situation.

"Nowhere Fast"
Will I ever get to where I'm going?
Will I ever follow through with what I had planned.
I guess it's possible that I have been a bit distracted
and the directions for me are a lot less in demand.
Will I ever get to where I'm going?
If I do, will I know when I am there?
If the wind blew me in the right direction
would I even care?
I would.
I take a look around; it's evident the scene has changed.
And there are times where I feel improved upon the past.
Then there are times when I can't seem to understand at all
and yes it seems as though I'm going nowhere....
really f**king fast.

Another great lyric is from a Pepper that I've been familiar with for a few years now. It defines to me throughout the whole song that having problems with friends, and family not understanding you can be hurtful.
"Too Much"
Catching my breathe is the term I use when the world gives up on me. Can you love or not? The truth finds all of us eventually.

And last but definitely not least is a quote that I use everyday of my life. Its pretty much specifies its meaning.

"CONSTANT IS CHANGE" -volcom stone

I live by "constant is change". I stand by it. Some of my friends can't except some of the things that are happening in their life. I can because everything is constantly changing, and I've come to accept that. ::smile::

Forth Assignment!

A meaningless conversation that I find myself in the middle of is girl drama. All my friends seem to feed off calling each other names and than talking about the drama at weekend parties. They talk so much crap about the other person, and ask for advice. Than a week later their friends again. I try to tune all of it out and have a good time but something always comes up.

Another conversation I tend to have a lot with my best girlfriends is how much guys suck. They take whatever they can get and than run off with your heart and than some other girl. We all make pacts that were better off single. And eventually get knocked off our feet by some new guy a few weeks later. I've been with my boyfriend for two years, so i basically find myself telling girls their better than that certain guy, and that they'll find a man who will appreciate their worth one day.

Girls won't talk about this kind of stuff with guys because were not comfortable. Nor will we talk about it girls that were not familiar with. This implies that humans have a certain comfort in some interactions that we have with each other. It all depends on the comfort level with the other individual.

Bonus Assignment

I don't see Yellowstone inescapable. Evacuating the 500 mile radius permanently would be a solution to the problem. In my opinion, if that's the area of a the mouth of a volcano that's supposed to go off every 300,000 years, why the hell are you building homes, and towns around it anyway? We can't prevent nature or weather from happening, but we always can prevent mass amounts of deaths. I would say booting the people out of their homes would be necessary. If they want to stay and melt, then let them.

Third Assignment! Yay!

Financial aid is a touchy subject with students. Some students are older with kids of their own attending school. Others have parents who make enough money to drive expensive BMW's around, but not enough for them to attend the school they dreamed of going to. Countless students come from very unfortunate homes, where financial aid is their only hope. I've done my comparisons on fortunate families and unfortunate families receiving financial aid.

Why is that a family who can afford to give their child a Mercedes for their first car be able to receive any type of financial aid? But yet a family who couldn't afford to get their child a first car receives an amount that still leaves them sucking wind? This is a very unfortunate case of the rich getting richer, and the poor getting poorer. The middle class people are screwed in this situation.

It's inhumane that any college bound student should have to pay excess amounts of money just to receive and education. College has left alumni bankrupt, in debt, or broke. Is financial aid really benefiting or jeopardizing the student?

Second Assignment

I don't think that the English language will die out. If anything it's dialect, or structure will change...like it has previously. If English changed, my thoughts wouldn't. How could my thoughts change if I know English? If the world around me changes the way it speaks, I may learn the new language but what I know won't go away. English is in my long-term memory, it could never go away or "fade" out.